ethos, pathos, logos and a funeral

Ethos, Pathos, Logos are words that are new to me, but don't think that I will soon forget them in my day to day life as I am challenged and challenge those with different views of mine. These words form a triangle. Each equally important to the other and achieving a balance in the structure of an argument. We start with the beginning of an argument, the topic and reason behind any argument or the logos. Ethos is represented by the ethos of the argument, the person that drives and represents the argument to the audience  and in turn represent the audience. I was at a funeral this weekend and my brother in law did the eulogy . It was such a beautifully written piece and no it was not anywhere related to an argument but he was delivering a topic to an audience that was receptive of his thoughts. He voiced the loss we all felt but tried to convince us to be joyful and to celebrate in this person's life. This is what pathos is I think, I might be wrong, but the way he delivered the message and touched his audience in order to soothed the pain was amazing. He is a great speaker and he was able to tie in all our memories and feelings about  the deceased that made everyone reminisce about the wonderful life she led and rejoice in knowing she is in a better place. He changed our way of thought.

Arguing for argument's sake.

     I think that as parents we all experience arguing at least once a day . I have an 8 year old son who is developing a personality, much like his father ( a great thing)and has to have the last word (not so great). It leads to great frustrations for all three of us. We want to instill a sense of respect in our child but also nurture the part of him that drives him to defend his point, without getting into trouble. Every night we have the same struggles with bath time and bed time and snacks. Those are the small, minor things where arguing is really not an option. But as my son gets older he is developing his own opinions on things. He has a new friend he wants to ride his bike to visit and feels he is old enough to go alone. He wants to play a video game that we will not approve of but argues that he knows that it is violent but he also knows it is just a game. He wants to watch a movie with some adult language and asks us to trust him , he knows not to repeat those words. Instead of throwing a tantrum he is learning to argue his point to get what he wants, and we in turn have to learn to teach him to do this logically and not emotionally. Easier said than done.
     This unit has really helped me out in this difficult task. The key is to teach our son to argue with his mind not his emotions. To think rationally and to use an argument as a way to discuss his point without letting his anger drive him. I have to admit that as a parent it is hard to follow that same rule. There have been some times that his father and I have driven an argument with manipulation and anger. It is not healthy nor is it fruitful. How can you get your point across with angry words?
     It is hard to teach an 8 year old what logic is. It might be easier to show him by our actions. To teach him how to logically have an argument without turning it into a shouting match we as parents have to set the standard. Arguing for the sake of arguing does no one any good and leads to negative behavior. At his age he might be a little confused by the notion of having a structured argument, but he might follow our example easier. After all , children are our mirrors. If my son grows up learning to argue and back talk in a way that is negative and destructive to our relationship it will be our fault. I also do not want a young man that grows up with a bully mentality learning to run over people with his words. We have all heard the old " sticks and stones" but the harsh reality is that words, delivered in an angry and manipulative way, can and do hurt.